Monday, August 24, 2009

"...And the Lord be gracious unto you..."

Whether we hold in our mind a glimpse of a hummingbird darting through a garden, or ponder the instincts of nature as we witness a squirrel being chased down by a red tail hawk, there can be no other feeling grip us so tight and as strong as knowing that both scenes are there for grace; one by sheer awe and wonder, the other through remorse. For one we behold the beauty of creation and are suspended in a humanistic animation of observance. For the other it is the paleness of original fear for the safety of a creature we do not know. It is the comprehension of awareness that all is as God has planned, that each of these species is showing it’s obedience to God, and that we, as witness, can proclaim gratitude for being present for each situation.
It is easier to keep ourselves aloft in the beauty of creation than it is to keep from turning our heads from reality. I am in the midst of both, day after day, of course it is much more common to be in awe of beauty than to cringe in empathy and at times even more common to miss the beauty because of its regularity in nature. Some days those changes come as quickly as they start. As I was driving down the road, approaching a curve, a rock in the middle of the road slowly began to come to life the closer I came to it. A box turtle had been making his way across the asphalt and had obviously been shocked into a stand-still, his head and legs tucked neatly inside the shell, his wide eyes peering out from the sliver of the hinged under flap that protects his chest. I picked him up to move him off of the road in the direction he had been moving when I noticed the bulge in his neck. Tumor or injury? I could not tell. I could only feel a sense of loss knowing there was nothing I could do to help.
It is one of those instances where you feel you are presented a fact simply to know that it exists. It moves you. It changes your complete line of thought for the rest of the day – or even week. It evokes feelings you haven’t reached for in recent memory. Here I was feeling good that I was able to help this creature by moving it out of danger and then have that pulled out from under me as joy turned to sympathy in realizing there were other things beyond my control. When situations involve animals and wildlife in general, it is instinctual for me to call upon St. Francis. His presence Is felt in a deep sense, whether you believe in intercessory prayer or not, and even though I cannot totally understand or regard all of the mystery of prayer, it is understood that his comfort is felt.
There was a difference this time, though, and I admit that it threw my prayer off. Instead of holding onto a thought of healing, and his prayer that requests, “Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;…” another memory took over and I began to recite one of St Francis’ favorite passages, Numbers 6:22-27; “May the Lord Bless you and keep you…The Lord make His face shine upon you…” I looked at the turtle. He looked up at me. It was a God moment for sure and God was shining on us both! “And be gracious unto you; …” I set the turtle down in the cool grass on the side of the road. I looked up to see a familiar car with a familiar face pulling up and stopping to ask “What are you doing?” “Moving a turtle off to the side of the road.” I replied. I picked up the creature to show her and as she slowly started off again she said “At a very young age my Dad did the same thing for a turtle and it had a lasting effect on me and how I treat animals. Thank you for doing that!” The car turned the corner. Silence entered. I could almost hear St Francis and the turtle continue in unison: “The Lord lift up His countenance upon you…And give you peace.” And peace was with me.